Why I started getting in front of the camera

If you are anything like me you don’t like what you see in the mirror. I never have. I always am trying to loose weight and watching what I eat. I am always waiting…waiting to hit that number that makes me happy. Because of this anxiety I dreaded getting in front of the camera. In fact even though I am a photographer I never got in front of the camera. I had amazing pictures of my kids and thought that was enough. I had some of my kids and their dad. I thought that was enough.

Then I got pg with #3. Being pregnant has made me go down memory lane with my first 2 pregnancies. What I found was that after 9 years of being a mom my memory was not good as I thought. When my husband would ask me well how big was your belly with E I couldn’t remember exactly. When I sat down and thought about it I only had three sessions with images of me in the last 9 years. It made me so sad. How could I had allowed this to happen. If I was gone tomorrow would my kids even be able to remember what I looked like. I realized that my hatred for myself was stopping me from having memories. Memories of different stages of my kids WITH ME.

So I decided to do something that I hated more than anything. I decided to suck it up and get in front of the camera. As comfortable as I was behind the camera it was the complete opposite when the tables were turned. But after my holiday images I realized something…

When I look at my pictures I don’t see the person that I wants to loose weight. I see a mom and a family that is happy. I don’t look at the images on my wall and think “oh I look so ….” I think wow I am so blessed to have a beautiful family and a beautiful image to remember this amazing time.

I also realized that posing myself and little photoshop (ok a lot) and I don’t look so shabby. I can do for myself what I do for my clients. Do I look like my pictures on a daily basis, NO. But in two years who will even remember. I will just remember being happy. If you would have told me that taking pictures of myself would increase my self-esteem I would have laughed. However it really has done that for me. I look at images of myself and smile. Smile for the blessing that I have in my life that go way beyond my looks. My two  three healthy kids, a wonderful husband and so much more.

So next time you grab the camera to avoid being photographed think twice. In ten years what do you want to remember. Hiring a professional you won’t look like those horrible camera phone snaps. You will look and feel beautiful. It is true what they say…Your kids don’t see the extra pounds. They see their mom that they love more than anything in the world. What better gift can I give my kids than a picture to remember our lives now.

The excuses I used  to make.

  • -As soon as I loose x amount of weight I will be in the pictures. That never happen and years went by with no pictures of me with my kids, husband or our family.
  • -I will hate how I look in the pictures why even bother. Why because now I look back and wish I had them. If you really do hate them put them in a drawer where no one can see them. Maybe in a few months or years you will look at them and think wow I didn’t look that bad or man I was young. Or even better wow I am glad I have these images. But what you can’t do is go back and take pictures of the past.

So you can see that I am not just blowing smoke here are some of my holiday pictures and my maternity images. Yes maternity. Even though I feel huge and the last thing I wanted to do was take pictures I forced myself. For my kids and for future me. Much to my surprise I think I look great for being 8 months pregnant. Plus the image of me and my kids makes my heart happy.

With Mother’s Day approaching it is the perfect time to take some pictures with your kids, husband or as a family. I have two mini spots available. I swear you will look beautiful and you will love your images.

To book a Mama Mia mini session email me and I will try to get you in before Mother’s Day. Click here for the info.

This pregnancy has me making a lot of changes and trying new things. I am so excited to share with you all my posts. On Why I started using a point and shoot for my everyday pictures plus all my nesting projects. How I started sewing and all the projects that pinterest has helped me with. I have them in my mind with a million other things. I will get them up before this baby arrives. To follow me on Pinterest click here.